We all have our own definitions of what true love is. Some people find it in fairytales, some in Shakespearean sonnets; others believe it is merely a phase and there is no such thing called true love in the real world.
What is it that we commonly expect in a true relationship? One could say, if someone is truly in love with you, they will make you happy, make you laugh, share good moments together and wipe away all your tears.
Even though everything we discussed above are important in a relationship, peace, stability, and harmony are the basic pillars in any healthy relationship.
It is true that you can’t always find a partner who has the same emotional maturity which you have. It is even more challenging to find a person who can make us feel secure in a relationship and make us confident that they would never cheat nor lie to us.
Another very important aspect in true love we should keep in our mind is that unstable people cannot build a long lasting relationship. In a stable relationship, there will be no room for hesitation and indecisiveness.
If we expect certain qualities from our partners, we should make sure we have those qualities in us too. We should always be fair and honest with our partners and should be honest with ourselves too.
Undoubtedly, relationships are often very complicated and it is extremely difficult to find the perfect balance in a relationship. Before finding their true love, people generally will have to go through a lot and become mature to a level where they know what to expect from a relationship.
In true love, you will have the urge to become a better person than you already are. Your partner will always be a helping hand for you to become better each day.
It is truly amazing if the both partners in a relationship has the feeling of freedom to be who they truly are. It is really not a good sign for a relationship if someone feel afraid or shy to reveal their true self and if they pretend to be someone who they actually aren’t. If you feel free to open yourself fully to you partner without having any fear of being judged, that is a sign of a magical relationship.
If your partner truly love you, they will listen to you carefully. They will not just listen to the literal meaning of the words you say. They will also understand things which you find hard to put into words. Your partner being able to understand your inner emotions is a significant part of romance and love.
The above does not imply that true love is agreeing to everything your partner say while sacrificing your own needs. A stable and healthy relationship gives you the courage to talk straight whenever you do not agree with something. Having to live on your partner’s terms is a sign of a very unhealthy relationship.
Two way communication is vital for a good relationship. Listening before speaking can reduce the room for assumptions and heartbreaks. Unfortunately many relationships and marriages gets ruined due to problems arising from lack of communication.
Communication is an ability to a certain extent. Not all of us have the ability to communicate our feelings well. Having a partner who can read your inner feelings is a gift, but everyone aren’t mind readers. We shouldn’t hold what we don’t like, what makes us sad, what makes us angry inside our heads and expect our partners to read our minds.
None of us are perfect and everyone has flaws. If your partner point out a certain thing they might want you to change. My piece of advice is not to be too upset about it, but to do a self-reflection and identify whether it needs to be changed for good.
Apart from communication, self-respect is also a key for a healthy relationship
Respect for each other is the most important factor to sustain true love. It comes from giving each other enough space for personal growth and never crossing the line, no matter what.
We shouldn’t always expect someone to praise us for our efforts and say “you are awesome”. It is enough that you understand how awesome you are, regardless you hear it from others or not. Having a good self-respect always improves your personality and eventually make your partners automatically respect you.
If someone ever tell you that they are not sure about their feelings for you and asks you to wait for them, my advice is, you shouldn’t. If a certain person honestly love you, he wouldn’t ever has any hesitation about it. If a person has second thoughts and need time to figure out whether he want a long-term relationship or not, they probably does not respect you enough to understand how valuable and precious your time is.
We should always keep in mind that nobody deserve a relationship filled with uncertainty, instability and manipulations. Instead true love is a relationship filled with peace and stability.
No one should carry on with a relationship with the fear that their partners might leave at any given time if they does not behave in a particular way. Such relationships are very toxic and such behaviours are referred as emotional blackmailing.
Your love is true and matured only when it flows smoothly with the confidence that your lover will love you for who you are, regardless of your flaws and continue to be with you no matter what. You will not have to ever carry the weight of being lied, cheated, being manipulated or ever feel insecure that your partner may leave you for your imperfections.
If you feel confident, calm, strong and fearless when you are with your lover, then never take them for granted and take care of them well. As they are the true lovers who can complete your life.
I am a Business Management graduate from the University Of Staffordshire (UK) and a qualified personnel officer who completed the National Diploma of Training and Human Resource development at Institute of Personnel Management (Sri-Lanka).
Apart from my professional career in the field of HRM, I am also a freelance writer of web and business contents.